Do you get it?

Clients regularly ask me to vet the assorted vendors who court their business. Some obvious questions:


•  How well does this person/organization understand collaboration? Project teams are usually cross-media, often not in the same region or time zone. In addition to expertise, effective collaboration requires access, responsiveness, and skillful listening.

•  How does this organization perceive themselves? Is there a clear vision and value proposition? Is this a group given to tough self-assessments, or are they narcissistic and in love with themselves?

An old Dr. Phil remark: "Be someone who gets it."

So . . . do you get it?


You can tell a lot about an organization by how they deliver their proposals. Proposal behaviors epitomize job performance. Even if judgments are processed unconsciously, most clients regard the speed, scope, and physical presentation of your proposals as indicative of job performance — ie, attentiveness to details, no bait-and-switch tactics, clear and reasonable expression of your insights (on any project-related issue).

•  Speed + accuracy = Motivation. Get that proposal in quickly, or ask the client when it would best serve them to receive it (and then beat it by a day or two, so you can discuss it before it's advanced to additional decision-makers). Imagine how it looks to a client to be ardently wooed for work, then made to wait days for your proposal. Hearing you say "It's been crazy around here but I'll get that estimate out to you!" may be a nifty sign (you're busy), but one shade away from hearing excuses  why you've missed a deadline (you're disorganized).

•  Appearance = Pride in work and gratitude. Is your estimate/proposal on your letterhead, or in an email, just a pile of numbers without an expression of gratitude for the opportunity, or even a signature? Many organizations require that clients sign on the dotted line before work can begin — fine if you need it, but personally I feel that if neither of our  handshakes are any good, then we probably shouldn't work together.

•  The "Tenzing Norgay" thing*. How have you defined the project and how you see process occurring? Do you suggest options and contingency plans for worst-case scenarios? Have you demonstrated why you're the right "sherpa" for this project journey?

"Give the client what they asked for, but tell them what you think they need." Your proposal/estimate is a great opportunity for showcasing how well you perceive their unstated needs, for defining both how you interpret the problem and the sort of solutions you think the client should consider.

You won't get every proposal, but every proposal is a great "venue" for showcasing how well you've listened to your client's briefing, and what you can do for them. If you're tired of the price game, stop giving clients mere numbers — instead, give them ideas, critical thinking, and strategies.

* Google it.

The Things (Some) Print Salespeople Do that Drive Me Nuts

I've bought printing for 30 years and certain sales behaviors separate the insightful professionals from the glorified messengers. This is not to be negative or "high maintenance" but here are some mistakes that are sure to alienate.


Be dismissive and discount the designer's role.
As a vendor, it's always wise to focus on the client but, as designer to that client, I've known print salespeople who blew off my phone calls, got tetchy over changes, or treated me as (their) personal production assistant ("Hey, can you email me those specs again? I can't seem to find the original..."). 


What they forget is that many times my questions are our client's questions; I am the client's representative. And courtesy counts: Don't talk down to me. (On one account, the salesperson recognized his mistake and sought to correct it with an assortment of rather slimy ingratiating behaviors, but you can't build a positive collaboration within days after years of rude self-interest. By the time he got it, it was too little, too late.)


Pass the buck (or: Make me do your job for you).
This is where the salesperson tells me, "Heck, I don't know nothin' about that, so lemme have you talk to Bob in our prepress department." A couple problems with this: (1) In some print shops, Bob has no experience talking to clients, nor are they a priority in his busy prepressed day; and (2) I've known some print salespeople to "follow up" with me by asking what Bob said — at which point the client and I find ourselves briefing two people who work within the same organization, but never bothered to check with each other before calling us.


Solution: As salesperson, you're the print team leader. Act like it. You conference-call the question-answer session so you're also in on the conversation when I confab with Bob from your prepress.


Don't jam up the delivery.
This is for your own good: If your delivery folks "misdeliver" a client's job, the seemingly harmless mistake can potentially "unsell" the hard work that came before in the sales, creative, and production cycle. Why? Because clients keep tab! Every time they have to put out an all-points-bulletin for a box of brochures that didn't arrive precisely, they'll factor such incidents into future decision-making (ie, How much of a hassle is it to rely on you?).


Precise delivery means a promise to the client has been kept: "On the 10th of October at 10 AM, the brochures will be delivered to office 1010 in your headquarters." Sloppy delivery means at 10:30 AM on October 11th, the client is in the mailroom begging a mailroom supervisor to help her go through 300 newly arrived boxes to see if her brochures might be in there....


Talk "teamwork" to my face and spread doubt behind my back.
Stay classy, OK? If you feel skeptical about my production specs, talk to me and let's work it out. If you feel the production schedule has you set up to fail, talk to me and let's work it out. But don't go behind my back alarming the client about the cost of a certain effect just because you don't want to run the job with it.


I suppose it's an inevitable joke that salespeople are aggressive and supremely self-confident, but when have these qualities alone ensured the success of a long-term relationship? Good salespeople are excellent listeners who put a premium on sensitive relational behaviors, and constant problem-solving for their clients. They're more consultative than cocky.

How to Alienate and Please Your Customers

Everyone knows these, has experienced them as customers, yet few organizations are able or willing to change the workplace culture that engenders such issues:


Customer Gripe #1: 
Raising the cost of doing the same business with you. If you're going to raise the cost, I need to see more benefits as a result.


Customer Gripe #2: 
Making me deal with "automated" conveniences that serve your convenience, not mine. (How much do you like repeating the same accountholder info over and over again to a pageantry of employees?)


Customer Gripe #3: 
Having to deal — on an ongoing basis — with your surly, defensive, ill-informed, lackluster employees.


Customer Gripe #4: 
Blaming or arguing with the customer when any customer complains.


Customer Gripe #5: 
Don't insult my intelligence by claiming something's done for my good when clearly it's not. Most of all, don't lie to me (because if it's discovered to be a deliberate lie, I'll walk away and never return).


What gives a customer joy and delight in doing business with you? What engenders loyalty?


Customer Joy #1: 
You resolve my needs, questions, and complaints with courtesy and understanding.


Customer Joy #2: 
You acknowledge my loyalty to you. If I question or complain about a product or service, you see the complaint as an act of loyalty.


Customer Joy #3: 
Your employees are informed, enthusiastic, courteous, and professional. They are well-trained in handling complaints, empowered to provide meaningful service recovery, and they're good listeners (which means they take time to fully understand the problem before attempting to resolve it).


Customer Joy #4: 
If I have complained or raised questions, you follow up to make sure the problem stays resolved, and reiterate you appreciate my business.


Customer Joy #5: 
You give me the choice of dealing with a human being or an automated resource.

Top 10 reasons why listening matters to human beings

10.

Careful listening saves people and organizations from making mistakes,
committing embarrassments, creating needless conflict, and
becoming encumbered by destructive barriers.

9.

The commitment to listening fosters learning.

8.

It encourages others to listen to us.
Human beings often need to be heard before they can hear. By listening, you earn your right to be listened to. We can actually help others become better listeners by modeling the behaviors ourselves.

7.

 Listeners have more power and impact on others than most people realize.

Good listeners have advantages.

6.

By listening, you’re not merely taking in data and info, but also bearing witness to another’s expression or interpretation.

5.

Being listened to fortifies our sense of self, clarifies our thinking,
helps us discover how we feel, and nourishes our sense of self-worth.

(Not being heard, never being listened to, saps our vitality     and enthusiasm for life.)

4.

Becoming a good listener gives us the power to foster positive change and

to transform relationships.

3.

Credibility is more important than slickness or glibness.
The best talkers are often not the best listeners.

2.

The best listeners often make the best leaders/managers.

The best conversationalists are often the best listeners.

And the Number 1 Reason...

The quality of listening in our lives—how well we listen, how well we’re listened to—shapes choice and character, in both the speaker and the listener.
Ultimately, it has the power to shape our quality of life.

Next week: How do good listeners gain advantages?

Why the Netflix Price Increase Even Rates as News

It's easy to see why Netflix has been a best-loved service: their price is good, they pick up on your preferences and try to customize choice lists, and (when my kid experienced a DVD delivery mishap) they're quick to respond and remedy. They were "reasonable" in every positive sense of the word.

That was 24 hours ago. Right now, Netflix's blog has capped out at 5,000 irate customer comments in response to their 7/13/11 price change. Their Facebook page has roughly 1,000 "likes" and over 50,000 irate customer comments ranging from "Cancelled" and "U Suck" to "How dare you treat your loyal customers this way; we helped you build your business."

"It's only entertainment," you might say. This is true. But it's really a story about relationship.

Consider the context in which Netflix made this change:

• The recession. Enough said.

• A general confounded public frustration with politics, especially as party leaders and Obama try to negotiate on the debt ceiling with — so far — a profound lack of progress. With this change, Netflix just joined the ranks of those inchoate external forces who, in perception if not reality, is making life harder for the consumer. Perception becomes reality.

• The state of Minnesota is in shutdown, months after the same thing nearly happened to the entire nation. Just when we thought we'd narrowly skirted that disaster, Minnesota's plight reminds us it's entirely possible still, especially as debt ceiling talks stumble on.

At the very least, instead of sending out stoic messages explaining a far more complicated price increase, Netflix could've tried to look pained at even having to make the change at all ("We know this will hurt but here's why we too have felt the economic times in which we all live"). If it's going to pain your customers, it had better pain you twice as much. And if it doesn't, at least try to fake it. Bring them on board as sympathetic partners.

In the end, this 60% increase is still less than $20/month, but Netflix forgot a few things:

• In a recession, people not only invest loyalties in but maintain affection for organizations that provide flexible, understanding solutions. Customers deserted Blockbuster and went to Netflix in droves, in part because of the recession's pinch, but also because Blockbuster's policies felt punitive by comparison.

• Movie escapism got Americans through the Depression; all we did was change technology and modality, but the emotional reasons are still the same.

• In a recession, people will keep searching for alternatives. If they find you objectionable, they'll settle for "good enough," rather than maintain a relationship in which they feel badly betrayed. Real or perceived, Netflix is coming off as motivated by simple corporate greed, and after years of corporate calamities like the BP oil crisis, the Fannie Mae debacle, bank failures, company bailouts, and stories of happily overpaid CEOs, the U. S. public is sick and tired of corporate and legislator greed.

Netflix wore the white hat — until now: No matter how well-justified this new plan, they were asking for a 60% rate increase. It doesn't matter if you're shining shoes or providing electricity: a 60% increase is going to raise comments, and those are only the customers who feel like speaking up. Only 20% usually do; the rest simply change, walk away mad, and talk bad about you behind your back, not to your face (partly why I repeat this credo to my clients — "a complaint is a gift") ...

Potential Netflix customers will be asking colleagues, neighbors, fishing buddies: "So, Joe, you were with Netflix. Did you like them? You don't? What are you doing instead?"

The fact is, with this debacle, all the negative reporting on Netflix's poorly handled price increase has given free and positive word-of-mouth to their competitors, at their cost.

The Dignity Domino

Security expert Gavin De Becker first introduced this term in his 1997 book, The Gift of Fear, urging employers to “prop up with courtesy and understanding” that bit of personal dignity in each employee, especially ones facing termination.

           

Young, broke, and eager to master his writing, John Steinbeck considered his options with a teacher’s advice to live in Europe: “Over there poverty is considered a misfortune. Here in America it’s considered shameful.”

Through no fault of our own, this recession has put a great many of us into a valley of shame—lengthy unemployment, debt, collections, notice of insufficient funds, foreclosure—all the scary harbingers of personal ruin.

            As this economy slowly turns around, more and more I get called to speak on matters involving workplace civility and dealing effectively with difficult customers. No surprise. As pressures mount, people are finding it harder to maintain calm, patience, and understanding; they’re knotted up with fear—fear of foreclosure, fear of collections, fear of losing their jobs.

            There’s nothing revolutionary about providing superior customer service during a slow economic recovery. It’s simple.

            Protect your customer’s dignity domino.

            Don’t embarrass the customer in front of others.

            No matter how sacred your policies are, don’t embarrass the customer in front of their own children (or employees). Recall the grocery scene from the old movie, “Terms of Endearment,” when a rude checkout clerk yells across the store, “She doesn’t have enough money!” — much to a young mother’s humiliation and to her children’s mortification.

            Emphasize that you’re aiming for a long-term relationship. How would you feel about remaining loyal to someone who throws you overboard at the first sign of trouble?

Don’t let your competitors beat you to it, in simply being kinder and more understanding to your customers. As a recent car commercial said, “This isn’t over for any of us until it’s over for all of us.” Until it ends, we’ll need to help each other, especially if we want to count on customer loyalties when households start to experience “disposable income.” They may condemn ruined buildings but the human spirit is strong, and people always, always, always remember how they were treated. 

Try a Little Seltzer for the Road Ahead

Recently I posted this on Facebook: “Today my local grocery had customers cracking up in the aisles when an employee on the PA system said: Welcome Publix shoppers to the best Friday deals ever (ever ever ever)...our deli just pulled rotisserie chicken from the oven and we got homemade bisque (bisque bisque)...As always, thank you for being with us today, where shopping is a pleasure (pleasure pleasure)....Gotta love a store with its own PA echo.”

To me that's great customer service. It was such a small, silly thing, but the smiles lingered on everyone's face, the employees were clapping and laughing, and they just proved their tagline.

In the same week, one of my clients said something very profound: “It’s not just that we should keep doing things better, but we need to do the same things differently. What’s more, we need to try and do different things.”

So what does that mean? I’ve put together a general list:

• Give your customers, your constituents, a different experience of you. To say you want to “re-engage” them means that some organizations will do what they’ve always done, only with greater frequency and intensity, but is that necessarily the best strategy? One client plans to go beyond sending thank-you form letters to their donors and instead start inviting them to pick-your-brain meals with national luminaries closely tied to their organization.

• Don’t just invest in transparency but aim for constant, porous dialog. New programming frequently fails because the targeted audience was never asked in the first place if such programs were even relevant, much less appealing or convenient. The best way to escape formulaic tactics is to ask your customer what they need most.

• Don’t forget to delight. One of the classic episodes of 1970s’ “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” was when the TV station crew struggled to maintain gravitas at the funeral of a clown whose credo was “A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.”

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Customer John, a business owner, is trying to lower his premiums by changing from Plan A to Plan B, but he’s opted to stay with the same insurance company. Here’s how a call center professional can either delight him or drown him in regret about his decision to stay faithful.

By refusing to “get” the real point of the customer’s call. John calls up, somewhat stressed that his change of policy application won’t get in on time.

Ugly: “Sir, I get it that your mail was held up by a snowstorm, but we can’t move the deadline on account of that. We can’t do anything about acts of God.”

Bad: [defensive] “Want to talk to my supervisor?”

Good: “I’m sorry you had some trouble with that, sir. Let me go over your account and get this done today so you won’t have to worry about it any more. We appreciate you’re keeping your policy with us.”

By focusing so much on policy readings, you actually demonstrate to the customer that you’re inflexible and somewhat shady.

Ugly: “Before we take your new application, sir, did anyone tell you that if you change your mind later, you can’t go back to Plan A? No, sir, it’s being eliminated. Gone.”

Bad: [loud eye rolling] “My supervisor can explain why it’s set up like that.”

Good: “Before we finalize this new plan, sir, I need to point out that as of April 1, we’ll be eliminating Plan A, the plan you just left. If you later find you’re unhappy with Plan B, just give us a call back and we’ll arrange other options for you to consider. Some of the new plans are pretty popular and inexpensive.”

Resolving the customer’s business is a big relief — and a chance to sell more of what the customer doesn’t want, need, or would even consider!

            Ugly: [perfunctory] “Is there anything else we can do for you?”

            Bad: [uninspired drone] “Have I told you about our Plan B Extra Plus?”

            Good: “Before we wrap up, sir, have we taken care of everything you needed to get done today? Have we answered your questions? Well, if you think of any later, please call us back. We’ve got some wonderful enhancements like the Plan B Extra Plus which is pretty popular with printing companies like yours. You may not have time to consider it today but the details are on our Web site, which also lists other printing companies in your region who’ve endorsed the Extra Plus. And once again, thank you for keeping your policy with us. Have a great day.”

The End of This Story isn’t Really a Nail-Biter

This week I had a large document that needed to be printed out, then copied. I want to stress this was not a complex document—no fancy graphics, no color photos— just straight black type on white letter paper.

So I sailed forth, plucky as the Pinta, the Niña, and the Santa María, believing a woman with a crowded schedule could get three sets of copies done inexpensively, in 20 minutes, without having to first notify her next of kin.

Things looked promising too: there was a manager and a management trainee on the floor, thoughtfully taking questions from new incoming like myself.

One of my questions meant the difference between a $20 versus a $100 copy run, and the manager, being management, said, “I don’t know. Patty! Can you help this lady, please?”

His employee Patty was already busy fielding the three other customers he’d helped over there, and—like a fish anxious to stay live—kept moving through a variety of tasks as she took my original. I posed my questions but unless that odd twitching under her eyes was a response, I wasn’t sure she had heard me, and meanwhile she was on the other side of the room, reaching for the wrong paper….

Armed with a spiffy padfolio and lacking only a cub-hero cape, the management trainee stepped up to ask if help was needed. I whispered, “Do you think Patty heard me?” The management trainee couldn’t be sure. But then training kicked in and she decided to ask Patty if she’d heard me. This took the next 5-10 minutes.

Finally I stuck two fingers into my mouth and whistled like Ben Cartwright ordering everyone back to the Ponderosa.

“We heard you,” said Patty, a little indignant at my need for coddling.

My document was copied in the nick of time, but then I needed a bold marker to address an envelope. Another employee found one for me, hovering near to ensure I didn’t try to make off with a Sharpie that predated the Clinton administration. Then, exit stage left, only to encounter the company truck blocking in my car, so their delivery guy could unload boxes. While waiting, new incoming—in the form of a little old lady asking the manager if he had change for a fiver. (What do you think?)

What’s Your Emotional Capital?

If you attended our Relationship-building Strategies webcast series in 2010, you know Linda Bishop (www.thoughtransformation.com) and I talked a lot about trust and how customers equate value with care. Trust, value, and care each carry an emotional charge. Now consider the consequences of ignoring that. The following is based on a real organization:

Twenty years ago, XYZ began with a groundswell of public and private support, answering a real need for international insights and services. As a 501(c)3, it occupied a crucial niche in the hearts and minds of its constituencies, but despite this promising start, over time XYZ fell victim to its own complacency.

Captains without a compass. As the board and management believed themselves to be experts, eventually customers became characterized as whining loons. Board members micromanaged daily activities. Management treated themselves to generous pay hikes and travel opportunities, but cited operating-budget shortfalls as justification for rate increases.

Customer service…? Routine customer questions and complaints were treated dismissively while threatening issues were given perfunctory attention—then left unresolved. Mistreated customers scoffed at any positive news released by XYZ. Its culture became famous for dysfunctional relationships — expressed by the number of litigations brought against XYZ by staff and customers. The company sought to suppress negative PR by presuming to put customers under a gag order. Roles and protocols became murky: employee relations with customers were marked by constant strife or, at best, the sort of cooperation brought on by an informal and inappropriate system of personal favors.

Consequences. XYZ embarked on an expansion campaign requiring new capital. Customer queries re: this new expense were never adequately answered. Demoralized staff either left or stayed long enough to undermine such initiatives. Customers also defected.

At this point, XYZ’s leadership is baffled. They blame the U.S. recession for diminished donations, relying on an ad hoc “strategy” of large single donors versus a coherent case statement and mass appeal to its publics. Its board and management continue to be coddled while staff and customers remain unheard.

What began with a few routine customer complaints — easy to fix; opportunities for forging deeper bonds with customers — has become a ship that’ll need to turn on a dime in order to survive, much less thrive. And yet it’s not really about the money, which is only a symptom of the emotional capital XYZ squandered over the years—by proving themselves to be uncaring, untrustworthy, and ultimately of diminishing value.

Key Behaviors of Post-Recession Customers

You may already be dealing with customers who aren’t shy about complaining, but

… better get used to it. Word-of-mouth is going to be more powerful than ever. I’m also adding advisory from (refreshingly blunt) business author Geoff Burch about the various ways we can kill off customer loyalty (in italics).

1. Post-recession customers will be increasingly intolerant of customer service errors. (“To defend your position to the death is a serious mistake. It costs so little put things right with your customer.”)

2. Customers will be more vocal and “activist” in using social networking sites to state their objections and negative experiences. (“Your offer is crap. Live up to the expectations your marketing generates.”)

3. Customers will not be committed to a particular brand but seek “best value” regardless of who’s providing it. It’ll be harder for market researchers to detect a fixed pattern of behavior in understanding these customers, and deeper insights will be required. (“Trying to be everything to everyone is a mistake. Don’t alienate your core customer base by trying to broaden your appeal.”)

4. Ninety-seven percent (97%) of your customers will research products and future purchases online, so your marketing and product support will need to be more targeted to specific customer needs and expectations. (“Don’t be afraid to ask. Where do my customers’ aspirations lie?”)

5.  Multi-channel customers want — and expect — to use a variety of ways to interact with you. (“Data should make selling more human.”)

T. A. S. K. Your E-mails

If you’re like me, you get dozens of e-mails per week about a variety of issues. And a trend I’ve noticed among my clients’ staff is the troubling frequency with which e-mailed instructions are lost through the cracks.

One thing’s for sure: the business world is not going to stop using e-mail. But that doesn’t mean you should let this unwieldy communications tool quash your ability to be efficient and effective. There are a couple simple things you can do to become more productive.

Immediately print out any e-mail that carries a task, an instruction, or time-sensitive info. You can follow the TASK guideline:

T = The email carries info that is time-sensitive.

A = Accuracy is crucial (you may need to use client language verbatim)

S = The info has to be shared with several team members

K = Keep this to document decisions, changes in direction, and for future reference

Why print out hard copies? For example, merely forwarding a client’s instruction to a colleague does not ensure that immediate action will be taken: you may need to walk across the plant to get the colleague’s attention and show the e-mail to underscore its details or urgency.

Also, to prevent duplication of effort, keep a notepad on hand for noting to-do items — eg, a client request like “Will you call me when the samples are ready?” This will reduce the time it takes to retrieve the e-mail a second time in order to extract the task or its deadline.

E-mail’s been around long enough now. Don’t join the ranks of those who constantly make excuses (“Oh, I’m sorry, I thought I sent that back to you!” or “I did see that e-mail but it must’ve been deleted by the system. Can you repeat what you said or re-send?”)

When your brand sucks (and when it doesn’t)

Would you ever do this?

You buy an expensive car and outfit it with luxurious upholstery and fittings. Experts tell you it’s imminently road-worthy and could take you far.

Then you hand the keys over to a randomly selected group of strangers. You don’t explain anything about the condition in which this car should be maintained, figuring “common sense” will guide that. You look away when it’s clear some of these drivers aren’t fit to drive, either from inexperience or irresponsible behavior. When wrecks occur, you expend a great deal of money to repair the car and appease the other injured party, but do little more than a perfunctory rehabilitation of the driver behind the wheel.

Asking the question again: would you ever say this?

“I believe in XYZ for my cell phone and wifi needs. Sure, they’re more expensive than anyone else and they never return my calls, but I figure it’s worth it because of their name. They’re often late for service calls and sometimes they get my bill wrong. When I ask for customer service I’m treated with indifference, sometimes rudeness, but what the heck, they’re a big name.”

Organizations spend huge dollars to create brand identity, but let’s face it: human beings are not loyal to brands but to people. Behind every brand are touchpoints who enliven your identity as an organization. If you, as a leader, are not specific and concrete in your vision of what the brand means, and how the customer should experience it,  then you’re bound to sabotage your own vision.

I drive past three competing groceries to shop at my local Publix. Their brand is based on friendly service and reasonable pricing,  but their credo — “where shopping is a pleasure” — is spelled out in actionable terms for the employee. If a customer asks you where to find a certain product, stop what you’re doing and don’t just point them to the aisle. Escort them there, and show it to them. Even if you can’t spell out every touchpoint, having enough in hand sets the bar to which employees can respond to customer needs.

Final question: What is your customer’s experience of your particular brand, and do your employees know how to make that experience come alive in a positive way?

Does This Make My “But” Look Big?

           When a customer gets upset, they feel off-balance. Some may even appear vengeful, as if they’re looking for reasons to be unhappy with you and your organization.

            Not so.

            What the customer is looking for are affirmations that (1) their complaint is being taken seriously; and (2) you are prepared to help them to their complete satisfaction.

            Two little words in the English language have powerful charges, and they’re the words “but” and “however.” Why?

            Our ears and minds are conditioned to pay special attention to the message following those two words.

            For example, what would be your take-away if I said, “Gosh, you always look so well-groomed, but today I find you’re somewhat overdressed for this occasion.”

            Or, “I’ll be happy to resolve this problem for you; however, I’ll have to run this by my boss.”

            In the case of the latter, the customer still isn’t hearing a helpful message, because tacitly you’re communicating, “I’m not really going to help you because it depends on what my boss says.”

            Flip it around—same words, different emphasis:

            “I’ll have to run this by my boss; however, I’ll be happy to resolve this problem for you.”

            “You’re somewhat overdressed for this occasion but gosh, you always look so well-groomed.”

            Get it? Always put the positive side of the message behind those two small but powerful words.

Lincoln's 5-Legged Dog (or: What Signals are You Sending?)

Abraham Lincoln once asked some Congressmen, "If you called the tail a leg, then how many legs would a dog have?" When they replied, "Five," Lincoln shook his head and said, "No, the dog still has four legs. Just calling that tail a leg doesn't make it so."

Organizations spend tens of thousands of hours and dollars developing eloquent customer care messages—and then overlook simple details, often in plain sight.

            One of my clients went to visit a new vendor at their offices. She knew it was a small business (but of long history); since they handled high-volume mailing operations, she didn’t expect a plush setting. And, like many businesses, they proudly stated on web site and collaterals that for over 50 years, customers came first.

            But let’s review what she experienced.

            Upon entering, she smiled slightly to see the lobby sign that welcomed her by name. Nice touch—and one she’d seen other vendors use.

            The receptionist, however, stared blankly back at her when she gave her name, and the name of her appointment. (“He’s still out to lunch, but I’ll leave him a voicemail to let him know you’re here.”) ….My client sat down in the lobby and returned calls on her cell. A group of employees came back from lunch and lingered in the lobby, laughing and joking loudly—no one greeted her, asked if she needed help, nor seemed to observe that she was trying to talk on the phone.

            She decided to freshen up in the restroom, which was a little unsettling—an overfilled wastebasket, trash on the floor, empty soap dispenser, and a damp, skimpy roll of toilet paper. She mentioned it to the receptionist, whose response was an indulgent smile — “Oh” — but not much else.

            Her appointment showed up, only a little late, and they had a pleasant meeting.

            Upon leaving, she stepped into the parking lot just in time to see an employee empty a full ashtray of cigarette butts from his car onto the pavement. He gave her a wink and she left.

            A week later, when she and her boss sat down with me to review vendor proposals, her appraisal ran like this: “Yes, they do have a long history in the business and their price isn’t bad, but….” Fortunately, her boss trusted her gut instincts and let her process her thoughts. “I’m not sure their service attitude is companywide. They seemed to think that repeating the customer care motto was evidence enough, but I’m not so sure. Don’t ask me how I came to that, it’s just something I picked up on while I was there.”

How Perception Becomes Reality

           In my recent webcast with Thought Transformation, Linda Bishop made a point that’s often overlooked:

            Whatever you’re thinking about a client and their projects will inevitably seep through in your interactions with them. Clients can and will sense feelings such as (negative) judgment, condescension, cynicism, and resistance.

            How?

            For starters, none of us is that good an actor. Our bodies are geared to disclose emotions with a variety of tiny signals—sometimes called “micro-inequities,” they can be as unsubtle as glancing at your watch while the client’s speaking, to a fleeting duck-and-dodge of eye contact when fibbing.

            Second, most humans are good at detecting those signs. We may be unable to articulate why someone made us uncomfortable, but from the cradle we’re very skilled in picking up non-verbal signals. It’s a facet of our basic survival instinct.

            Third, you can keep your guard up and maintain a good façade some of the time, but when you’re busy and things are hitting the fan, it’s easy to lose control over that. If you think your client’s prone to terrible ideas, even a tiny pause over the phone or a slight crease around the mouth can convey a smirking, “That’s the worst idea I’ve ever heard.”

            So how do you get this under control? Understand that:

            • Your client’s reality is not your reality. They have their reasons. You’re there to solve problems with them, in which case your best judgment calls should be about the work and process, versus whether or not the customer’s a champion procrastinator.

            • You need to stay away from negative nellies. You know who they are. They’re the people in your workplace who live to complain—about the boss, their co-workers’ shoes, their spouses and children, Congress, the cost of cucumbers, and—inevitably—customers. Such people will deplete your batteries without affording new insights or improvements. Shut it down. You have better things to do.

            • All individuals and systems have some degree of dysfunction. Clients undergo periods of personal and professional crisis, of confusion and difficulty. If you can demonstrate big-hearted support—even for the reasons why they can no longer give you business—you’ll have earned their trust and respect.